eliz ayaydin

Why We Travel: Travel musings for new age western seekers

Why We Travel is a new age travel series that inspires western seekers on their journey to self-actualization.

What is a western seeker?

When we say western seeker, we mean young professionals living in western countries that value personal experiences over material goods. They are adventure junkies, curious explorers, and truth seekers — united by a common interest in deepening their understanding about themselves through their experiences in the world.

You may ask, what is self-actualization?

It refers to a desire to reach your full potential and find inner fulfillment. Once your basic human needs are met, the drive to become your best self kicks in — whether through creative acts, mastery of skills, or other meaningful pursuits. 

Why is this important?

Despite life becoming increasingly comfortable in the western world, we find ourselves continually seeking more. This series was born out of our question — What secrets to self-fulfillment are hidden in different cultures around the world?

We’re dedicated to finding the answer. For the course of the next few months, we’ll travel in pursuit of discovering how people find purpose in their daily lives — and we’ll bring these learnings back home to you.

To create some structure in our investigation, we’re focusing on 4 core areas of interest:

Heartbeat: The unifying force that keeps a culture alive.

Rituals: Actions performed in the service of a cultural belief.

Values: An important belief within culture.

Underbelly: The hidden, unpleasant side of culture.

Chapter 1: San Francisco

As western seekers, our global inquiry will begin in the USA – home of the brave, land of the free — where nothing is free but the right to pursue your wildest dreams. After all, the very ideals of the modern “life with purpose” seems to have been born in the post-war United States and subsequently transmitted throughout the majority of the western world.

Nowhere is the “American Dream” more thriving in 2020 than the supreme tech epicenter — San Francisco. While smaller in diameter than its esteemed elder brothers New York and Los Angeles, San Francisco is a true behemoth in its impact on the world.

Full disclosure: SF is also the place we’ve called home for the last few years. The city stole our hearts before we stole each others on a Sunday afternoon in May in Golden Gate Park.

It is a land of extremes and paradoxes. Charming and offbeat, yet largely homogenous in its resident profile. Bathed in wealth, yet riddled with poverty and homelessness. Part cultural hotbed, part corporate wasteland. Billionaires in shabby hoodies. Million dollar studios. Winter is warm, and summer is cold — San Francisco is as glorious as it is gloomy.

The new generation of San Franciscans are thriving, optimistic and ready to build a brighter future. This sense of innovation cuts to the core of how people define themselves in the Bay Area.

People love to work, but not in the traditional sense. Unlike other powerhouse cities in the US — where personal identity is all-too-often tangled with the size of your annual bonus — people in SF tend to find meaning in the creation of new and great things.

It makes sense. In a town where one line of code can fundamentally change the way people live, its inhabitants are understandably obsessed with creation. The inventions and products that emerge from this chasm of creativity are so significant that they become common verbs in our daily life. Googling this, Ubering there, FaceTiming you. It’s true to say that what starts in SF, really changes the world.

This call to invent manifests in a variety of unique ways in the local culture; every man, woman and dog has a side-hustle (or dreams of one). Stock options hold more weight than base salary and microdosing 100mg of magic mushrooms each day for “inspiration” is nothing out of the ordinary.

It’s not all work, though (definitely not on Fridays, at least). Compared to the average American high-achiever, SF professionals truly value a “work-life balance.” You can’t blame them of course — with the curvy pacific coast, Napa wineries, and Tahoe slopes a short car ride away, SF has access to the most diverse and beautiful natural wonders that America has to offer. And San Franciscans certainly use these outlets to recharge and spark their creativity.

Waking up late to stand in an hour-long brunch line is standard procedure and ducking out of work for a couple hours to picnic in a local park is nothing to be ashamed about. Purpose in life is measured, at least in part, by one’s ability to enjoy it with full flexibility.

So what can we learn about living with purpose from the tech-worshipping, nature loving millennials?

Fulfilling work is, no surprise, a key ingredient to personal fulfillment. But then the question remains, how do we find fulfillment in work? The dreamers in San Francisco show that people feel purpose when they are bringing something new and meaningful into the world. This is a far more healthy way to think about success, vs the traditional salary seeker.

A balanced existence is key to maintaining a healthy sense of purpose. Whether it’s work, adventure, community or just a little Netflix — San Franciscans understand that joy is multi-dimensional and can be found in all kinds of places. Avoid burnout in one area by balancing it out with another. The folks in Northern California are blessed with a diversity of nature, culture and action that enables this symbiosis.

Heartbeat: Creativity, possibility

Rituals: Inventing (coding), nature immersion, holistic wellness (healthy eating, cbd oils, etc.)

Values: Building the future, betting on winners, success as religion, the outdoors/nature, flexibility, balanced living, staying healthy

Underbelly: Wealth gap, homelessness, gentrification

Chapter 2: Columbia

Colombia is a tale of resilience.

Once considered the most dangerous country in the world, Colombia’s modern history is written in the blood of its people. From the rise of drug empires to the violence that remained in the wake of their fall — the people of Colombia were living in fear for over 50 years.

In Medellin, we talked to dozens of locals and not one over the age of 30 lived through this dark time unscathed. We heard that pretty much everyone in the city has a friend or family member that was murdered during these years. Juliana, a thirty-something local, recounted a time when her classmates would see corpses on their morning walk to school. This, unfortunately, was life as many Colombians knew it.

The roots of Colombia’s violent past are tangled in its unique geography. Covered in Amazonian jungle, with ports on both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans, the country was the ideal smuggling route to the US. As brutal conflict erupted between the national government and extremist groups in the 1960s, the time was ripe for the shadowy drug trade to emerge from the cracks and take a stranglehold of Colombia’s people.

Enter Pablo Escobar. El Padron. The most notorious Colombian of all time. He’s been glamorized by popular culture, often dubbed as a “divisive” figure in Colombia’s past. However, from what we learned from locals, the clear majority of Colombian people see him as a monster who is certainly not worthy of the celebrity status he has received.

Note: Our tour guide wouldn’t use Escobar’s name in public, instead using the psydonym “Paul” to avoid interruption and unwanted attention

However, the people of Colombia showed unbelievable resilience through all the years of torment. Amongst the chaos, they always found a reason to celebrate. One of the locals we spoke to called this “happy pessimism,” an ability to understand that life is often cruel and unfair — and by accepting the way things are, Colombians fully commit to living each moment to its fullest.

This low-bar-to-happiness attitude can make life richer. During the FIFA World Cup in 1990, the Colombian’s were so thrilled with a single goal against Germany that the people took to the streets in dance and celebration. In fact, they were so proud of the goal that no one really cared that they only tied the game.

This hopeful resilience eventually paved the way for the golden age in Colombia’s history that its people enjoy today. Since the collapse of the drug trade, the country has become increasingly safe and prosperous, attracting visitors from all over the world. Sites of horrific atrocities have been transformed into symbols of light and hope. Vibrant art and culture has emerged from the poorest neighborhoods in the city. Eco-chic hotels and restaurants have popped up, catering to a trendy western audience and newer generations of Colombian people. The transformation is fragile, but very real.

Colombians pride themselves on weathering the storm — turning something bad into something good. A striking example of this is “Comuna 13,” a local Medellin favela that went from (literally) the most dangerous slum in the world to a thriving tourist attraction complete with world famous graffiti art and, I kid you not, a modern escalator system that tracks up the steep hillside slum.

As the country thrives, Colombians have been recognized as among the happiest people on earth. This may be because they put family and community above everything. However, if you look a little deeper, it is evident that the scars of trauma still linger among its people. Shockingly, none of it’s recent history of violence and conflict is taught in schools. Nor is it overtly memorialized by its government.

The dark side of this fuck-it-let’s-just-celebrate-life mentality is that many Colombians have developed a selective memory: trauma is often repressed and not fully processed. To make matters worse, there is a lack of mental health resources available for the Colombian people — in fact, it’s so undervalued that their language doesn’t have an equivalent phrase for “mental health.” It’s estimated that only 3% of citizens seek treatment, a number that strikes us as significantly less than what we would expect for people who have been so exposed to tragedy.

Nonetheless, the Colombian people can teach us a hell of a lot about living our best lives. We all face hardships that can hold us back from seeing the light. But, as Juliana told us, “If Colombian’s can find happiness through the darkest of times, then you can do it too.”

Heartbeat: Resilience, redemption, relationships

Values: Family, heated but loving culture, affectionate (emotionally open), progress through art (Botero), seizing the moment, “we’re all in this together” attitude

Rituals: massive family outings, big meals, dancing

Underbelly: Selective memory (trying to forget parts of what actually happened), suppressed trauma/PTSD (mental health), domestic abuse, objectification of women

Chapter 3: Argentina

Argentina is a country filled with passion.

To paint it with a single brush would be a disservice to its incredible diversity, both as a geography and a culture. The country is so vast that it encompasses a variety of different ecosystems, from the tropics to the Andes, waterfalls to glaciers. The people, plants and animals that inhabit these areas are equally as diverse and unique. From the polished, indulgent wine country in the north to the buzzing metropolis and the rugged mountains of the South — there is A LOT to digest in Argentina. And a lot to learn.

We dug deep into two prominent regions before exploring the marvels of Patagonia (which will be the focus of our next blog post): Buenos Aires and Mendoza. It’s worth noting that to the average traveller, these regions could be mistaken for different countries all together.

Our first stop was Mendoza, which is perched on the eastern side of the Andes, in a region of foothills and high plains. Once an active volcanic region and southern outpost of the great Inca realm — Mendoza and it’s surrounding mountains, vineyards and rivers are something out of a fairytale.

After spending a few vino-fueled days meandering around the area, we were fortunate to meet a man that swiftly showed us that the heart of Argentine culture is passion. Enter Nino Masi, dressed in cowboy attire from head to toe, an immensely joyful man as wild as the wind. Once a regular suit in the export business, Nino decided to leave the corporate world many years ago and start hosting travellers at his beautiful ranch in the heart of Uco Valley (El Viejo Manzano, about an hour ride from Mendoza city center).

Over a long dinner of lomo (Argentine term for beef tenderloin), Malbec and cuban cigars, Nino convinced us that he had found his true purpose through his inexplicable talent for showing people a good time on the land that he loved. His philosophy was that we should always follow the passions of our heart, regardless of whether society tells us it is irresponsible to do so. After more than a few glasses of Malbec, this point seemed to really hit home (unsurprisingly so to the couple that had just left their jobs to travel the world). Nonetheless, the smile on Nino’s face was wise and true. This is a man that has truly found bliss by following his dream, with no compromise.

Looking back on our time with Nino, it's clear that Argentines have a fiery passion for life that is quite unlike anything else you can find in South America. You can see it in the flowing red wine, the heated conversation, the love of indulgent food, the late group dinners and the mid-afternoon siestas. It’s a way of life that must have been exported from Spain and Italy in the early 20th century and has since become the heartbeat of their vibrant culture. God help anyone that gets in the way of an Argentine living their best life.

As we parted ways with Nino and set our sights on the vibrant capital of Buenos Aires, our passion was ignited and we were excited to see what the buzzing metropolis had to offer.

Walking around the trendy and electric neighborhood of Palermo Soho, we were off to a good start. The energy was high, and hordes of young people were out and about late into the night. It almost felt like a peculiar mix between New York and Europe, with old Roman cobblestone streets and cute little boutiques that could have been pulled directly out of Williamsburg.

As we dug deeper into the capital, however, it was evident that the modernity of Buenos Aires seemed to somehow detract from the unique and passionate Argentine identity that we fell in love with in Mendoza. The hodgepodge of corporate influences from the west seemed to have fused into the culture, creating a plethora of hip and high-class restaurants. While enjoyable to experience as travelers, these imports didn’t feel fully authentic to the culture. We kept thinking back to Nino’s story about leaving the corporate world to live a life more true to his identity — and couldn’t help but wonder whether the modern, western influences in Buenos Aires were misaligned with the traditional heartbeat of the Argentine people.

As we boarded our plane to Patagonia, we reflected upon our experience in Argentina thus far and what it can teach us about finding purpose in our own lives. In a nutshell, there’s something special about living true to your core identity — or in other words, following your passion. While this may seem obvious, it’s identifying and truly commiting to your passion that gets people closer to living a purposeful life. The Argentine formula for thriving is what we call living. And living is doing what lights you up most.

But how do we apply this learning to our own lives when most of us, quite frankly, find it hard to identify the things that truly fill our cup?

The challenge most of us face is this; there is more and more pressure in big cities to conform to a lifestyle or identity that reinforces a dominant ideology, which generally includes a limited set of career and life paths. It’s way easier to get lost in what we’re supposed to be doing than take time and space to discover what we want to be doing. Add this to the fact that we are more starved for time and space to think than ever before — and you can start to see why so many of us feel like we are experiencing this crisis of purpose, passion and identity.

In short, it is important to follow your heart — even when society tells you to go in another direction.

Heartbeat: Passion, indulgence

Values: Adventure, strength, masculinity, entertainment

Rituals: Big social meals, staying up late, heated conversations, meat, drinking good (and lots) of wine

Underbelly: Cultural identity crisis (in big cities), complacency, aggression

Chapter 4: Patagonia

Patagonia is awe-some. In that it evokes a lot of awe.

What is it about stepping into the wild that makes us feel so alive? Is it the beauty inherent in nature that lights up our soul? More specifically, how do these highly-charged emotional experiences help guide us to live more in alignment with our purpose in life?

These were some of the questions that were swirling around our mind as we landed in El Calafate, Argentina — the first stop on our 2 week adventure through Patagonia.

The rugged and beautiful Patagonian steppe has been a crown jewel of our travel itinerary since the moment we started planning. We felt a deep and primal calling whenever we saw a photo of the towering mountains in Torres Del Paine, the crystal lakes of El Chalten, or the massive glaciers shimmering in El Calafate.

Moreover, we guessed that the time spent among the mountains could be an excellent canvas to examine the link between nature, awe and purpose. After all, nature is an age-old, well-documented source of fulfillment for people in all walks of life. Various studies over the years have proven the link between increased exposure to the natural world and overall physical, mental and social well being. From reducing stress, blood pressure and muscle tension, to increasing positive feelings, the benefits are endless. While ecotherapy is now becoming trendy in the west, the practice of healing in the forest has been a medicinal practice in Japan since the 1980s (re: shinrin-yoku).

After a week of incredible hiking in Patagonia, we found ourselves breathless while sitting in our car in the middle of Torres Del Paine national park. The wind was howling but the sky was clear, and the view of the majestic towers in the distance were a sight to behold. We were on the edge of our seat, literally shaking with excitement as a full-grown Puma walked right in front of our vehicle and tracked along with us for a few hundred feet. We couldn’t believe our eyes because the local guides told us that seeing a puma was near impossible. They said, “they’ll always see you, but you’ll never see them.”

But then again an adventure into the natural world is often unpredictable. In fact, the unpredictable nature of these types of activities is the very reason they are so popular among western seekers. Why else would we pay exorbitant amounts of money to meander throughout the world’s most unforgiving terrain?

We seek surprises. Beautiful, incredible and often terrifying memories that turn into stories and stand the test of time. Stories like, “we got lost for 5 hours and ran out of water” or “we saw a bear 10 feet away and nearly died.” Maybe, like the Puma, it’s our animal instinct to seek the rewards of untrodden paths. Or maybe it’s that life can become so predictable in our daily routine that we crave something new. Either way, you can always count on feeling energized after a day in the wilderness.

We returned to our lodge that night with full hearts, watching the sun as it dipped behind the silhouette of the Andes. The wind was howling like we have never experienced it before, reaching a ferocious 150 km/hr (90 mph). It felt like the lodge was going to fly off its hinges, taking us with it — and turns out, many cars tipped over that night in the park.

Patagonia is highly temperamental, you see. A beautiful blue sky day can turn into a maelstrom of thunder and wind within a matter of minutes. Not only that, but the region is extremely rugged and unforgiving. Vast, dry and desolate — it’s one of those places that you have to imagine was nearly impossible to inhabit only a few hundred years ago.

The unforgiving majesty of Patagonia has a tendency to inspire serious awe in travelers. And awe, we’ve found, can provide us a glimpse into a deeper, more connected way of living.

It’s quite clear that the grand scale of nature reinforces the fact that we are a very small part of the universe. There’s actually a psychological phenomenon called the overview effect where astronauts view earth from outer space and experience a cognitive shift in awareness. Similarly, when you see a massive mountain structure, or a crystal clear lake, or a wild animal, you experience this unexplainable feeling. It inspires new perspectives — about your life, the world and your place in it. It creates a feeling of connectedness with the planet and its people, bringing a sense of compassion and reassurance into your every day.

There’s really no better description of awe than a moment of perspective — where the marvel of the world is unavoidable and our petty personal problems seem to dissolve in comparison.

We believe we can use these insights to change the way we think about our place in the world. If we can shift the way that we think about our own purpose to be a little less self-centered, we will undoubtedly be rewarded. Nature, after all, is a master-class in humility.

The irony is that we get “lost” in nature to find true connection. Regardless of the fact that we are technically more connected than ever before (via social media, growing globalization and prosperity), we seem to be getting more and more disconnected from the important perspective that experiences in nature provide.

Fear not, however, because the age-old remedy is out there and welcomes all beings with arms wide open. After a few weeks in Patagonia we are feeling nourished and recharged, humbled and deeply connected with the world around us. And yes, we certainly feel much smaller than we did before (though maybe a little wiser ;) ).

Heartbeat: Awe, surprise, beauty

Values: Adventure, connection with nature, taking risks

Rituals: Exploring the unknown, hiking, climbing

Underbelly: Overtourism, nature for monetization

Chapter 5: New Zealand

What a time to take a travel sabbatical.

In early March, we found ourselves scrambling to find the last bottle of hand sanitizer on the entire South Island of New Zealand. After scouring every pharmacy, gas station and corner store within 50 miles of Christchurch — we almost resigned to make it ourselves out of rubbing alcohol and aloe vera. After all, this was the kind of thing that scrappy vagabonds would do, being fresh off 14 days of open roads and mountain adventures.

We were gearing up for our flight home to Sydney, more inspired than ever before by a country that surpassed our every expectation — yet the shadow of a looming darkness was upon us. The entire second half of our travel sabbatical was quickly going up in flames as COVID-19 broke out of mainland China and started spreading in Europe.

It was a weird feeling, almost paradoxical. On one hand, we were ready to get back to safety and isolation across the pond in Australia to ride out the storm. Yet, just the thought of giving up the freedom that we found on those beautiful country roads made our chest feel tight with longing and anxiety.

You see, there is something really magical about a driving adventure across New Zealand. Both of us were very familiar with road trips, particularly of the weekend variety. But the moment after picking up our dinged up, early 2000 model Toyota rental car (so archaic that it had no aux cord), we were shaking with excitement and ready to conquer the country.

New Zealand surpassed our every expectation. The freedom to explore every nook and crevice of the island with complete flexibility was liberating. The scenery was as impressive as the best in Patagonia, the people were kind, and the driving took our breath away. Every road was more beautiful than the last, making all-day drives pass quicker than you can say “Lord of the Rings.”

Nonetheless, the global threat of Coronavirus was like a shadow growing in the afternoon sun. At the beginning of the trip it was just a crazy news story that we would bring up in small talk with airbnb owners and fellow travelers. But as the days rolled on, the reality of the problem began to grow to the point that we felt uncomfortable sitting in close proximity to other travelers.

In the end, we made it back to Sydney safe and sound only a few days before New Zealand shut out all international travelers. A few weeks later, Australia closed its borders and we were stuck in isolation, mourning for our future plans to climb mountains in Nepal and practice yoga in Bali. And, of course, dreaming of the beautiful open road that we left behind.

But there’s always a silver lining. And with a few weeks of rest behind us it’s clear that hitting the “pause button” does force us to take stock, heal and reset our goals. Whether you need to slow down from a fast-paced job or a supercharged travel itinerary, there is a nourishing quality to this downtime that we think will do the world good in the long run. People are calling it “The Great Pause” and asking us, “What will you do when society returns to normal?” In other words, how will you use this once-in-a-lifetime situation to change the way you live?

At least from our perspective, we have started to wonder whether the things that we chase with such ferocity in life — the ideal job, the perfect house, the unforgettable trip — are actually not the things that make us the most happy. In fact, we are getting incredible joy out of cooking, reading, meditating, walking and talking. Some of the most basic, least expensive and most accessible things any human can do. And they are too often lost in the pursuit of larger ambitions.

So, it looks like we are in for a little detour from our original plan. We set out to find purpose across the globe. But maybe what we are looking for will end up being a little closer to home.

The end

The chapters of Why We Travel are created by Tom Mansfield and Eliz Ayaydin between December 2019 to April 2020.

Tom and Eliz have spent much of their careers thinking about purpose. While Eliz has helped brands identify it (re: design & brand strategy), Tom has helped them communicate it to the world (re: marketing & advertising). They’re now taking a career break to travel and think about what their own purpose is.